my holidays in a nut shell - part one

The Radle family- 1st family photo ever taken









Lynne marie - best sister ever















DEACON - my favorrite cat. she is a musical kitten.









Joe Petre - he is good to me

NYC planning

joe and i are traveling to NYC for a weeklong vacation to see animal collective.

woo!

i am confirming the details now.
the new animal collective record (leaked on christmas!) is now one of my favorites. its good. real good.

i am really excited for this month.
so much to look forward to and so much to learn from.

changing.
changING.
CHanging.
ChAnGinG.


Get it?

12-30-08

cameron is trying to be better than me right now. i really want him to realize that we all know that his 161 plays on myspace are from him playing them over and over again on his own computer.
there is no way his 12 friends that he has on there have all listened to his music 20+ times. haha.
who does he think he is kidding?

i realized that deerhunter is becoming such a favorite of mine. cover me, comfort me, cum for me...
dirty romantic awesomeness. i love it.

i also realized that i had a great christmas with lots of people who love me and care and it really makes me feel so so nice inside.lynne is the best sister. she has such a great supportive boyfriend and i hope that one day i will find someone like she has. She bought me the best things. i wish i could have bought her more.. but what can i do? i wish i had a money tree.

i do have a wonderful christmas tree in a pot ready to be planted in the spring thanks to joe petre.
he is wonderful. and i am glad he is there for me.

yesssssssssssssssssssssssssss!

blizzard of 08

there is a blizzard outside and my cats wont stop watching the snow fly around from my window seat in my wonderful warm apartment....


and there are birds outside i can hear chirping, i hope they are okay.


I am currently working on my top 5 records of the year. stay tuned.

buffalove

i watched i think 5 or 6 cars get stuck in the snow today and i saw random strangers helped push the cars out. it was so nice. nice to be in buffalo where everyone can bond at the fact that it snows alot in buffalo.
it made me feel so comforted and also so BUFFALO.

we're talkin' proud Buffalo!

the reason we are not together:

you havent changed

see?

what do you want me to do with them?

6:58pmCameron

go fuck yourself you fucking dyke

6:58pmBernice

tell me

i will hold off

6:58pmCameron

fuck you

6:58pmBernice

bye!

6:58pmCameron

fuck off

fuck off

fuck you

suck my dick

you have

hahahahahah

you suck at giving head you fucking wench

your too stupid to know how to suck a dick

fucking faggot

go rot in hell you asshole

one week later

i just got two great Christmas gifts.

one from lynette - which was a carved buffalo out of some weird white stone. totally incredible.

and the other from Joe - a small live christmas tree, potted so i can plant it later. He also brought me lights for it. probably one of the most thoughtful gifts ever.

I am super happy about all of this. It feels like christmas to me.
its nice... really nice.

and oliver wont stop chasing his tail right now which is making me laugh pretty hard...

good night tonight.


love.

how do i feel?

hmmmm...

i slept in and i feel like crap.
my heart hurts and my head wants to explode.
this is going to be a long day.
but i am super thankful for all of my friends.
the mass emails, text messages and IMs are making me feel better...


on a positive note, it snowed and i am happy about that.
i am going to do some serious window sitting and thought collecting watching that snow.

a long day to break this habit, one that i enjoyed the most.
a long week to feel better about everything as a whole.
a long month to collect my thoughts and find myself.



i really cant imagine what he is feeling right now. He loves me more than life. I am forever unforgivable from him for this. all i can say is that i am sorry and that love was never the issue... and will never be an issue.

Au Revoir.

a year in a nutshell.

One year in the making.

i want to speak french

fluently.









im working on it - come ask me anything in like 3 months.

im a wreck.

its been really hard because i am in the process of breaking up with Cameron and its sad. But its my choice. so than why am i sad? who knows. He is buffalo in my eyes. We get each other. we wear funny glasses and are not afraid to welcome the 80s back into our daily lives.
i know its right, he basically got on my nerves everyday and i hate to be sad and to make him sad.
I think its funny when you are breaking up with someone and you know you got there for a reason but you cannot remember all the bad.
Thats what i am going through right now.